FACTS OF LIFE
Forwarded by Susan
- After you reach a certain age happy hour is a nap.
- A good time to keep your mouth shut is when you're in deep water.
- Be careful reading the fine print. There's no way you're going to like it.
- Do you realize that in about 40 years we'll have thousands of old ladies with tattoos?
- Money can't buy happiness, but crying in a Cadillac is more comfortable than in a Yugo.
- Money will buy a fine dog, but only kindness will make him wag his tail.
- No one ever says, “It's only a game,” when his team is winning.
- No one has more driving ambition than the boy who wants to buy a car.
- Scratch a dog and you'll find a permanent job.
- Seat belts are not as confining as wheelchairs
- The nicest thing about the future is that it always starts tomorrow.
- The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket.
- To err is human, to forgive — highly unlikely.
- Why is it that at class reunions you feel younger than everyone else looks?