CONTRASTING NATIONALITIES

Forwarded, with a sly grin, by AirBurd.

On a beautiful island chain in the middle of the ocean, 20 men and 10 women are stranded on a deserted island. The group consists of:

  • Two Italian men and one Italian woman
  • Two French men and one French woman
  • Two German men and one German woman
  • Two Greek men and one Greek woman
  • Two English men and one English woman
  • Two Bulgarian men and one Bulgarian woman
  • Two Japanese men and one Japanese woman
  • Two Chinese men and one Chinese woman
  • Two Irish men and one Irish woman
  • Two American men and one American woman.

One month later, the following things have occurred:

  • One Italian man killed the other Italian man for the Italian woman.
  • The two French men and the French woman are living happily together in a ménage a trois.
  • The two German men have a strict weekly schedule of alternating visits with the German woman.
  • The two Greek men are sleeping with each other and the Greek woman is cleaning and cooking for them.
  • The two English men are waiting for someone to introduce them to the English woman.
  • The two Bulgarian men took one look at the Bulgarian woman and started swimming to another island.
  • The two Japanese men have faxed Tokyo and are awaiting instructions.
  • The two Chinese men have opened a convenience store, restaurant and laundry, and have impregnated the Chinese woman in order to supply employees for their business operation.
  • The two Irish men divided the island into north and south and set up a distillery. They do not remember if sex is in the picture because life gets somewhat foggy after a few liters of coconut whiskey. However, they are satisfied because the English aren't having any fun.
  • The two American men are contemplating suicide, because the American woman will not shut up and complains relentlessly about her body, the true nature of feminism, what the sun is doing to her skin, how she can do anything they can do, the necessity of fulfillment, the equal division of household chores, how sand and palm trees make her look fat, how her last boyfriend respected her opinion and treated her nicer than these two men do, how her relationship with her mother is the root of all her problems… and why didn't they bring a damned cell phone so she could call 911 and get them all rescued off this Godforsaken deserted island in the middle nowhere so that she can get her nails done and go shopping?