CONGRESSIONAL SPOOF SUPPORTED BY TRUTH

Forwarded by JackMac

Wouldn’t it be interesting to see Judge Alito and Chief Justice Roberts questioning Democrat Senators to determine their qualifications for public office? Just imagine matching the IQs of the Senators and the Judges!

The questions should go like this:

Judge Alito (JA): “Senator Kennedy, I see from your official resume that you attended Harvard University.”
Senator Kennedy (SK): “Yes, your honor, I certainly did.”

JA: “Did you graduate?”
SK: “Your honor, I respectfully request that you not pry into my personal life.”

JA: “Is it not true that you were expelled from Harvard for violating the honor code, to wit, you hired someone to take an exam for you?”
SK: “Mr. Chairman, I want to go on record that I disagree with this line of questioning. I ask the chair to order the Judge from asking questions about my private matter.”

Senator Specter, Chairman of the Judiciary Committee: “Answer the Judge's questions. He answered all of yours.”

JA: “Senator Kennedy, we have on hand a transcript of the session of the university's honor council attesting to your fraudulent examination and subsequent expulsion from the university.”
SK: “I have had all I can take of this line of unreasonable questioning. I am going to ask Al Gore how he managed to keep his early departure from Vanderbilt University Divinity School away from the eyes of you religious nuts!”

JA: “Wait, Senator Kennedy, I want to ask you about the 26 phone calls you made from a motel room the night Mary Jo Kopecne drowned in your car at Chappaquiddick, when you said you were asleep all night.” (Kennedy flees the hearing room)

Senator Specter: “Chief Justice Roberts [CJR] will now interrogate Senator Biden (SB), Democrat of Delaware.”

CJR: “Senator Biden, is it not true that you were expelled from law school for plagiarizing another student's work?”
SB: “Wait, Ted, I am going with you!” (Biden flees the hearing room)

Senator Specter: “Judge Alito will now interrogate Senator Feinstein, Democrat of California.”

JA: “Senator Feinstein (SF), why did you vote for the former Grand Kleagle of the Ku Klux Klan of West Virginia (Robert Byrd) to be the Democrat Senate Majority Leader in 1986, 1988, 1990, and 1992?”
SF: “Wait, boys, I am going with you.” (The lady from San Fran flees the hearing room)

(The hearing recesses for coffee)